CARTER'S SHADOW
Chapter 19 - By Christopher Patrick Lydon
The night sky was beautiful overhead as they sat on the rear
steps of the house; West sipped a cup of hot cocoa while Tony told him about
his life: where he was from, what life was like growing up in Toronto and
then coming to Ottawa for university.
"Carlton U, where the K stands for quality," he joked,
leaning languished against the handrail, continuing to smile down at West.
"Carleton, where K is also a grade..." West quipped
back with a smirk.
"Well, it's ok," Tony admitted. "The school's
cool, I have some interesting profs. Sure I have one convinced Greece was
the ideal democracy, never mind the fact they owned slaves and considered
wives property..."
"Are you sure you're a skateboarder?" West asked in
amusement, looking up at the older guy as he set his cocoa down on his knee.
"I was waiting for you to ask that," Tony replied.
"I don't exactly fit the type."
"I can relate to that," West admitted. "So, what's
the story there?"
Tony pushed his thumb through one of his belt loops and rested
still a moment in thought as his fingers brushed the wide tan leather belt
he was wearing to keep the jeans on his lean hips. They had fallen a little
and a pair of plaid boxers poked up suggestively.
"Okay, you have to promise you won't tease me!" Tony
said looking up and into West's eyes, trying to stop a smile of his own from
escaping.
"Scout's honour," West held up his fingers in the
salute.
"You need to prove you're a scout before I buy that whole
'scout's honour' thing," Tony said firmly. "Trustworthy!"
West blinked, "Huh?"
"Come on," Tony said, "prove it. 'Trustworthy.'"
"A scout tells the truth," West reiterated by rote.
"Honesty is part of his code of conduct. People can depend on him."
Tony gave him a suspicious look, "Okay, here's a tougher
one, 'cheerful?'"
"A scout looks for the bright side of things, cheerfully
doing any task that comes his way. He tries to make others happy." West
smirked in satisfaction, "'Thrifty.'"
Tony grinned back, "I never said I was a scout..."
"Bullshit," West responded, "'thrifty!'"
Tony shrugged, "A Scout works to pay his own way, and to
help others. He saves for the unseen needs and he protects and conserves nature.
He carefully uses his time and property." He crossed his heels as he
leaned on the rail, "Happy?"
"Yeah," West nodded, "so now that I've proved
I was a scout, you tell me your story."
Tony laughed, "I was kinda hoping you forgot about that.
Right, a promise is a promise." He came and sat down on the step alongside
West and settled in, "Well, I've always been good at skating. It was
my mom's idea when I was little to get me into skating..."
"Yeah, my dad was the same way. So you played hockey?"
West asked with a smile.
"Not quite," Tony admitted reluctantly. "She
took me figure skating...."
West choked on his cocoa, "Oh.. well...that's..."
"Yeah, I know," Tony said laughing, "cruel and
unusual punishment, bordering on child abuse. Man, I used to get teased for
that shit; I was too thin for hockey and so I was stuck."
"You poor kid," West admitted, trying his best not
to laugh at the mental image of Tony in a spandex tuxedo, ice dancing...
"No laughing!" Tony accused with a grin of his own.
"You promised!"
"Sorry," West replied, stifling the chuckle. "So,
you were saying... you and skating."
"Yeah," Tony said, eyeing West's grin with amused
suspicion. "So anyway, when I was twelve, my dad finally stepped in and
said no more if I didn't want to, and believe me, after nearly six years of
constant teasing about it, I was ready to quit..."
"That's a shame," West replied. "I mean, did
you like it?"
"Well," Tony looked thoughtful a moment, "I did
enjoy it at times; I learned a lot from it, too. And when I stopped I found
I kinda wanted to do something. That was about the time I figured out that
good on one pair of skates meant I was good on another."
"The in-lines," West surmised.
"Suddenly I went from the dumb kid that figure skates,
to top of the skate park. Funny, huh? Now, because it's on concrete, and has
ramps and shit, it's cool, but if it was on ice it's 'gay'." Tony shifted
a little on the back step and glanced at West meaningfully.
West nodded, "Yeah, I can see it; you are pretty good on
the skates, though."
"I hear 'Captain Condor' is pretty good as well,"
Tony said, nudging West. "I should get you on a pair of in-lines and
see how you do."
"Sure, if you want I'm up for it," West replied.
"Did we just make a date?" Tony asked, raising an
eyebrow.
"I don't know," West replied, and he nodded. "Yeah,
I think we just did."
"Good, 'cause I've been trying to work up the nerve to
ask you all night," Tony replied. "Wow, a date with Shroom's older
brother."
"Shroom?" West asked.
"Your bro, his nickname's Shroom, like as in the mushroom
from Mario Brothers."
West glanced up towards Joey's bedroom where his brother had
gone a couple of hours ago, adamant on leaving his brother and his friend
alone to get to know each other. He looked back at Tony, "Do I want to
know why?"
Tony shrugged, looking uncomfortable, "He's... it's that..."
Tony trailed off, "Man, I shouldn't have said anything."
West nodded, as if confirming something he already knew. "And
you?" he asked.
"No!" Tony shook his head firmly, "not my scene;
I just know your bro through the skating, not the other shit."
"Hey, it's okay," West said, "I just..."
"You're a bit of a boy scout," Tony finished, pushing
West slightly.
West grinned and pushed Tony back, and soon the two young men
were tussling on the lawn. Tony was thin, but wiry, and while West was easily
in the better shape, Tony could still hold his own.
They rolled over, and West pinned Tony's shoulders down neatly.
"Stay down," he declared pointedly.
"You win!" Tony admitted, struggling vainly again
to get away but failing miserably. "So you got me, what now?"
They had rolled till they were half under the veranda, the large
wooden supports around them, and the cold stones cast into shadows, as they
both breathed heavily a moment, intimately aware of each other.
Tony was staring up at West on top of him. "You're going
to kiss me," he said, breaking the silence.
West blinked, "I..."
"You were thinking about it," Tony observed, bouncing
a bit to get comfortable again.
"Yeah," West admitted, surprise settling in.
"What stopped you?" Tony asked.
"You talking, for one thing," West grinned.
"I do that when I'm nervous," Tony admitted with a
shrug. "And I have this hot guy on top of me and...I just can't shut
up..." he let out a nervous laugh.
"Yeah," West laughed, pushing his hair back from where
it was spilling forward around his eyes.
"Leave it;" Tony said as West made to push it back,
"it looks cool down."
West arched an eyebrow and allowed his hair to fall back framing
his face as it gave in to gravity, "Better?"
"Yeah," Tony said with a nod, "it's cool like
that, makes your eyes stand out. So, you were in the middle of kissing me."
"I was thinking about it," West replied. "Now
I'm not so sure--you are kind of demanding."
"Yeah," Tony said breaking into a toothy grin, "I
get told that a lot."
They returned to silence, West looking down at Tony's chest
as it rose and fell in the night air. Quiet and rhythmic breaths, a slight
hitch to them, barely audible, but...
"You're asthmatic?" he asked in surprise, just noticing.
"Yeah," Tony replied, "how did you...?"
"I can hear it," West said quietly. "It's faint,
but you wheeze a little with each breath."
"Really?" Tony asked, lifting his head a bit to stare
at his chest. "I guess I don't hear it."
West leaned in, a moment of instinct, and he batted Tony's nose
with his cheek lightly, causing Tony to tilt his head back in surprise as
their lips met in a kiss. There was a moment's surprise, before Tony relaxed
his lips and gently parted them, West taking that first exploratory kiss--feeling
that warmth of connecting with someone in such an intimate way for the first
time.
The kiss stretched on, each just going with it, under the veranda,
in the night. Tony returned the kiss fully as his arms went up around West's
back pulling him down against him. West's hand ran up Tony's ribs as he fell
a bit onto Tony, the two rolling a bit so they were side by side.
After a short eternity, they both pulled back and West brushed
his lips with the back of his hand, looking at Tony a second, before diving
in again. The two connected again for another, more intense kiss.
The second break had both of them gasping for air. West sat
up, his back against one of the support struts of the veranda, as Tony sat
up opposite him.
"I knew you were going to do that," Tony said brightly.
"The second I first met you I knew you were going to kiss me."
"How'd you figure?" West asked, resting his hands
on Tony's knees.
"The way you looked at me when we first met, that kind
of... anticipating look. Like you wanted to, and wanted me to know you wanted
to," Tony grinned.
"That really isn't fair," West replied. "My brother
told you I was gay before we met, so you were looking for something."
"Oh yeah," Tony replied, "that's half the battle
right there."
"Cheat," West accused.
"Hey, so long as I win..." Tony grinned pulling his
legs up crossed under him as he leaned forward. West mirrored the gesture
as they kissed again, this time a short kiss. The kind you are 'supposed'
to give to someone you just met.
"Yeah, you're winning I guess," West admitted. "How
long have you known you were gay?"
"I've always known, I guess," Tony said thoughtfully.
"I think the first time I realized it was when I watched this movie,
and it showed this coed shower scene with all these naked girls and guys,
and I was staring at the guys... I think I realized what I was doing and thought
it was wrong, and tried to look at the girls wondering why I couldn't see
why they were attractive."
"Yeah," West agreed, "I don't get it either.
I mean, I've looked at girl porn and tried to imagine it, but..."
"It just doesn't do anything," Tony finished for him.
"Exactly. My parents don't know, though. My dad would just blame my mom,
tell her it's her fault for putting me into all those figure-skating classes."
"I'm sorry," West laughed openly. "I said I wouldn't
laugh, but you just don't look like the type of guy that figure skates."
"I work out," Tony said. "I hated being scrawny,
especially getting picked on; my brother Dan has all this equipment, and when
he left home I got to keep it. I wanted to get into shape to beat up all those
guys that laughed at me." He wagged his fist at West threateningly.
West caught the fist in his hands and pulled it to his cheek
tapping it there twice before letting it go, "There, you win, you beat
me up."
"Great, first guy I met I actually like and I end up beating
him up." Tony shrugged, "I am doomed to be forever single."
West laughed, "I don't know, you're doing a pretty good
job from my perspective."
"Yeah?" Tony asked. "I thought I was just making
an ass out of myself."
"No, it's cool," West replied, still laughing. "You're
fun."
"I should hope so," Tony said proudly. "I practice
this routine in the mirror every morning."
"How's the kissing practice work, then?" West asked.
Tony sucked a breath through his teeth, "Yeah, that I'm
kinda improvising as I go along. I never..." he actually blushed.
"You never...?" West asked.
"Well, look, between school and skating, which isn't exactly
the most accepting of environments out there, I've never...actually... ever...
you know... kissed a guy."
"The truth comes out at last," West replied grinning.
"Don't worry, me neither, this was kind of my first kiss as well."
"I know." Tony waggled his eyebrows.
"How do you know?" West asked suspiciously.
"Your brother told me; you're like this super prude."
West glared up at the house, "Do my entire family know
about my sex life, or lack thereof?"
"Hey, what you and your family share ain't none of my business..."
Tony held up his hands, grinning.
"That's just plain gross," West replied.
"Incest, a game the whole family can enjoy..." Tony
rolled with West's mock punch, and he fell over again onto the grass. "So,
you were saying about taking me out on a date?"
"I was?" West asked, bemused.
"Sure," Tony said, "you were going to take me
dancing."
"I don't dance," West replied adamantly.
"Bullshit," Tony said, "you just don't know how.
But I bet you'd be great at it--shake that butt of yours on a dance floor,
show off to everyone..."
"Maybe," West said with a grin, "but only if
I get to see you shake yours..."
Tony shrugged, stood up turning around.
"I didn't mean now..." West balked, looking around
to see if anyone could see.
Tony turned back, still unlatching his belt, "You sure?
'Cause I'll do it if you dare me to."
"That's okay," West blushed bright red.
Tony grinned and pushed West's shoulder, "I know, I'm just
messing with ya."
West stood up so he was level with Tony, "Careful, we already
found out tonight I can beat you in a fight."
"Yeah, that's 'cause I let ya." Tony stepped closer
to West, hands on hips, "I bet you can't do it again."
West stepped forward and slipped his arms through Tony's and
around his waist, pulling him close.
"Oof," Tony said dramatically as he was suddenly pulled
close. "Ok, now this is just cheating..."
West leaned in to kiss Tony lightly on the lips, gently brushing
them with his own, "Hey you're not the only one allowed to cheat, you
know..."
"K, so... yeah...umm..." Tony blushed a little, "I...
you... that is...mmmmph!" West shut him up by another full kiss. Tony
struggled a moment half-heartedly, before he relaxed, hands still on his hips
as he arched his back, pressing his hips forward against West.
West for his part, allowed his hands to travel down, to the
rough elasticated band of the boxers, down over the loose belt and over the
outline of a perfectly round...
"Hey," Tony said pulling back a little, "that's
my bum!"
West stopped in surprise at his own actions, as he made to pull
his hands back.
"Well don't stop!" Tony insisted. "I thought
you were like a gentleman."
"I am..." West said, "I..just..." he shrugged
and leaned back in for another kiss.
"What are you boys doing up...oh!" West's father clattered
through the back screen door, dressed to start work on the farm like he did
every morning at that time just before dawn. He hadn't expected to find his
son and another boy...
West immediately jumped back. "Dad!" he said in shock.
Tony's eyes were wide in shock, "Mister Harding...sir...I...err..."
West's dad looked first from his son, to Tony, then down to
Tony's belt that was hanging open, back up to Tony then across to West. "I
see, well you boys have fun..." He grabbed his pail from beside the door
and tramped his way down the steps, "But you know, this is a farm, we
have a hay loft for that kind of thing you know."
West blushed, glancing at Tony, who desperately re-buckled his
belt, his own cheeks flushed bright red.
Jonathon Harding's laughter could be heard all the way to the
barn.
